Linux, Windows, Mac? What are these?

Mac Lion Logo: But I never went there in the first place!

People* keep telling me that I need to get a computer. I'm writing this at my favorite internet hot spot: the public library! I call it a “hot spot” because there is always hot spots from urine on the floor. I hope all of you will one day experience the pleasure of walking around a public library barefoot.

Many people* recommended it, so I went to the Olive Garden and I asked about their computers. They were kind and asked me what I wanted to eat. After I had the Fettuccine Alfredo (who knew that it was pasta !?!), I was referred to their friends, Best Buy. 

Best Buy is the most confusing place in the world. They had a section for computers but there were so many that I was confused and the salesman did not help. He kept asking me questions like Do you want a laptop or a desktop? Do you want to run Windows, Linux, or Mac? What is your spending limit? I am not a computer whiz! I told him I'm not a geek, so obviously I don't know what he is talking about. Also, I let him know that I am physically unable to run. So if Windows, Linux, or Mac are some type of marathon or foot race, count me out on my Podiatrist's orders. 

I did not get a computer. It's okay. I would have missed the library. Lucky me, there's a hot spot right under my feet. 

*I mean possums